Motherhood, in Life and Ministry

motherhoodlifeministryThere were days when my boys were young that I was just tired and wanted to run away. I didn’t want to even hear the word “mommy”. I didn’t want to be a mother. In fact, I was one of those girls who grew up saying I’d never have children. I often wondered what God was thinking when He allowed me to be a mother. I would grow weary of doing for my children without appreciation or notice.

Then God, in His faithfulness and gentle ways would cause my heart to look upon those precious faces and my heart would remember truth. The truth that His did call me to be a mother. He placed these precious, loud, curious, rough and tumble boys into my arms with a heavenly purpose in mind. Yes God desires us mothers to raise them for Him, to teach them the word and show them the love of the Father but children also teach us.

They teach us to be a mother. They show us the Father and help us to understand His love, patience, mercy and grace. So often we, as mothers, get so caught up in trying to do and be what we think a good mother would do and be that we forget the lessons that God is trying to teach us through our raising children.

In those moments that I wanted to run, give up and give in I learned to run to God. I learned that it was in His strength I could go another day. It was because of Him and what He was doing in my heart that I would learn to keep on fighting for my children. After all if I wasn’t teaching them, loving them, holding them, praying with and for them who would? No one. I was the one God called. I would be the one who would lead them.

Over seven years ago when I led me into women’s ministry I found these same emotions arising. I would become weary of being a spiritual mother. I would become frustrated in the fighting for “children” who seemed to not care. Day after day I would fight battles within and outside that threatened to rendered me useless. My enemies, were my flesh, Satan, the world and the very ones I was trying to minister to. The lies, betrayals, gossip and criticism at times brought great bouts of  discouragement. I wanted to quit, run away and give up.

But God has called me, and so, just like when I felt this way raising my boys, I learned to once again run to Him. God, once again being faithful, reminded me that it’s not about me, or how I am feeling. It’s about them, what’s best for them, what they need. It’s about  who they need me to be – who God expects me to be. I was reminded that I have a God who empowers me to do that which He has called me to do. He called me to be a mother. This my dear friends is a blessing – a high calling. And I had learned that God will enable me to rise above my flesh and do what He has called me to do.

So today God continues to call me into “Mothering”. As I look back I can see how all the lessons beforehand led up to this role as a” mother”. The women God brings to me today are broken, many know nothing of God let alone what it means to be loved by a mother. God is calling me to mother His lost children. Children who do not know Him or know very little about Him. These women, these young girls need to see and experience what being a mother really is about. They need to hear the truth, not only about being a mother but about their heavenly Father. They need to know they are heard, seen and understood. They need mothers who have not only “been there” but who are real and honest about the struggles, and heartache of mothering.

This journey has only begun and I stand with great anticipation to see all that God will do. I am thrilled to serve God in this way. I am humbled that He has chosen me to help Him save these girls and their unborn babies. Working in a pregnancy center will bring new, hard challenges I know and I fully realize that there will be day that I will not  “feel” like fighting for them. I will grow weary and feel  like giving up.

And yet, I have learned who to run to and I will rise in confidence of who Christ says I am and believe the truth of what I KNOW – not what I feel or the lies that the enemy would have me believe – I will stand on the truth of who Christ is and the truth of what His word says.

I will think like a mother, sacrifice like a mother, love like a mother. I will fight like a mother! I will fight with God to help save a generation that does not know Him.

 

 

 

Photo courtesy of morguefile.com by greyerbaby

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When A Heart Weeps

TearMy heart is heavy. Broken. On days like today I wish my heart didn’t feel so much. I wish it didn’t hurt so deeply. The pain, at times, is unbearable.

There is One who weeps with me when my heart weeps.

My heart aches for the mother whose child has lived the first year of his life broken. He has spent more time in the hospital than at home. She holds him tight not knowing how many more days she has with him. Her heart weeps.

There is One who weeps with her.

A family torn apart. A father leaves. Another family, another marriage falls through the cracks of the church community. No one seems to notice.

There is One who sees. One who weeps.

A discouraged woman sits in the pew. She is considering suicide. She wonders if anyone would miss her. Does anyone see her tears, her pain, her loneliness.

There is One who not only sees but feels her tears as her heart weeps.

A man comes and sits in church Sunday after Sunday looking for answers. He is in bondage. He wants to believe that he can be free. He wants to believe he is loved. No one reaches out to him. No one takes the time to know him.

There is One who knows Him. One who loves Him.

I look around my community and see those who are dying a spiritual death. I see those who need a hug, an encouraging word. I see that woman whose marriage is failing. The mother who cries each night for her wayward child. I see the one who wonders where God’s people are in the midst of suffering.

Why aren’t we being the hands and feet of the One who has called us to Preach the Gospel. My heart weeps for I know I should do more. I know I can do more. But I struggle, for I am only one and a weak one at that.

My heart weeps. It is broken for the brokenness I see in my community. There is One is weeps with me. He has promised that He will be with me. He will be my strength, my Rock, my Counselor.

My heart weeps for I know I can not help them all, I am only one. But there is One who whispers to my heart, “minister to the ones I send you, it is enough.”

I will go. I will do the work of weeping with those who weep for I know there is One who also weeps with us.